Some Goals Are In The Mind

The strangest thing happened this afternoon. I was forced to write with a pencil on a piece of paper. The irony here is that my monitor decided to take a nap, just as I was ready to write a post for the goal-writing project Ben Yoskovitz is having at Instigator Blog, Set Your Post Thanksgiving Goals Now

In light of that, my goals are slightly altered. Well, not really altered, but re-numbered. It looks like one of the first goals I need to realize and appreciate is resourcefulness and resilience.

Don’t think I was a calm, cool cucumber before I found the pencil and paper. No, no, no. At first there was a flare of panic (the sky is falling!!!) while I made a few frantic calls. There was even a walk across the street to see if the Goodwill Store had a monitor in stock. They didn’t.

The pencil had to sharpened to a nub before my monitor came back to life. (I now have my Mom’s old one safe and sound in my living room ready for backup duty, if necessary.)

But, back to resourcefulness and resilience. This morning, I wouldn’t have considered either things to nurture as goals of the mind. That’s because everything worked as it should; I didn’t need to go looking for ways to fill the pond for my ducks. Now, after necessity threw this thought at me, it deserves a second look.

The plans we make to get to our goals, even the goals themselves, aren’t carved in stone. We set our minds to an end and cut the path to that end and, suddenly, between Steps Two and Three, up crops Step Two-A. Now what? Well, if we can’t re resilliant enough to draw on what should be a wealth of resource, we’re going to have a hard time of it. No matter how we feel about the new situation, Step Two-A is here and isn’t going away by itself. And, for all we know, Step Two-A might be just what we need to reach that goal a little sooner, a little better, a little wiser.

We can’t be so totally reliant on what we have today that we can’t change gears if we don’t have it tomorrow. If the car breaks down, we need to remember that we can walk.

Oh, if you’re interested in my goals and plans post, head over to Thoughts & Philosophies.

Complimentary Connections

Spirituality doesn’t start or end with us realizing we have a Divine connection with the Universe. Acknowledging that connection is certainly a major part of our spiritual lives, but first we need to acknowledge our connection to each other. More to the point, how we interact with each other one to one.

Yesterday, Mike Sigers posted Flattery Versus The Compliment at Simplenomics. Mike was specifically targeting the message to people involved in sales. As I read it, though, he could have been talking to any group or any individual. We will all be better off if we heed his words:

“A compliment is what the person wanted to hear, while flattery is praise to which he is totally indifferent.”

Didn’t you ever wonder why some people seem to have a general connection and others act like they were born in a kelly-green plaid polyester suit? The connected ones know the difference between giving an honest and genuine compliment while the polyester suit people transparently throw out wholesale sound bites.

Go gently. An out-of-the-box compliment will often sound like a piece of fakery. It also has a tendency to put people off.

Listen first. Small talk never hurt anybody. Getting to know what makes the other person tick will open the door for authentic compliments.

Be real. Most people are uncomfortable on a pedestal. We are God-like; not God.

Yes, we are connected and it’s a good idea to work on our inter-personal connections so we can realize the Universal connection.

Have Pride In The Blessing You Are

We’re all looking to manifest and shape better lives for ourselves and, in doing that, we sometimes have to stop to redefine entire thought processes.

For instance, Phil Benichau at Phil for Humanity recently wrote that he’s
Proud to be Proud, ending his post by saying, “I just hope I am not too proud.”

It’s often a mental wrestle to make the distinction between having just the right amount of pride and being excessively boastful. We’ve been taught that pride is one of the deadly sins and pride comes before the fall. At the same time, we’re told to take pride in ourselves and to be proud of our accomplishments.

Actually, pride is ok, if it’s properly tempered. When I write something that comes out particularly well, it pleases me so much that it does evoke a certain amount of pride. The feeling, however, must be mixed with gratitude that the ability to put words together is a talent given to me probably before birth. In reality, I can’t claim title to this talent, but it pleases me to the point of pride that I was blessed to be a custodian of it.

Which brings me to Lyman Reed’s I Am That at Creating a Better Life. Lyman was discussing David Cameron’s book, “A Happy Pocket Full of Money” and the subjective reality phrase “I am that” from the book.

To a great degree, the way we perceive the world outside of ourselves guides us in manifesting what we are. Lyman made the observation that, “Simply saying (or thinking) the phrase ‘I am that’ allows our subconscious minds to acknowledge that we have created what is going on.”

We have and should acknowledge power and responsibility for the way things are in our lives, but we also need to realize the Universe gives us that power and responsibility.

It all goes together, really. I manifest that I’m a writer. The Universe allows me to have pride in that, as long as I don’t forget the Universe can always make changes.

Yes, I’m proud to be proud; I am that.

Soul Journey

We often speak of demons. Our demons. Our worlds won’t be set right unless and until we face our demons.

But are our lives really beset by things so terrible as the word ‘demon’ implies? The sound of the word, DEEMUN, conjures thoughts of ugly, hateful, unnatural. We, on the other hand, are beautiful, loving, natural.

One of my sisters chooses, instead, to call these things “beings of wariness”. It’s a little longer to say, but it comes closer to an alignment of ourselves with ourselves.

All of our troubles stem from fear and our fears can be many. Money, illness, isolation, acceptance, for example, are not only fears in themselves, but they can fuel each other into a bonfire frenzy.

The troubling parts of our lives need to be faced, but not as the horrible monsters we think of when we think of demons. They need to be recognized and embraced as the wary parts of ourselves that they are. They need to be righted through awareness.

Every mind is on a soul journey and the journey can only happen in awareness. There are no fears in the soul, simply tremors from the troubles of the mind.

Becoming aware of the things that trouble our minds is crucial to releasing the beings of wariness. When we’re open to release, our souls relax.

There’s no need to fight our beings of wariness with the strength we’d fight a demon. We’re made with such wondrous beauty, we have no demons.

11 Keys To Changing Your Life

What are individuals but micro-organizations? In June, Kent Blumberg published 11 Keys to Change. Kent’s business is business and he was talking about organizational change. These same keys can be applied to changes we want to see happen in our lives.

• Face the reality that change is needed. If not getting where you want to go doing what you’re doing, you need to do something else.
• Set slightly out-of-reach goals. Make your mind reach in new directions; you’ll develop new thought patterns and new ways of acting.
• Tweak your routine. Disrupting the little structures in your life bring larger insights.
• Listen to someone new. Search for new thoughts from new people on old subjects.
• See, as clearly as you can, your vision of the future for you and tell people about it. If you can start to communicate what you want, you can start to get it.
• Don’t be afraid to change mid-stream. If something isn’t working, try something else until you find the thing that works for you.
• Walk the talk you’re talking. Don’t sit around with an “I’m gonna” attitude; do it.
• Look for, recognize and appreciate the many small wins along the way. They will be plentiful and will weave together to make your big win.
• Don’t stagnate. Read, take a class, join a club; do whatever is right for you to be the main participant in your life.
• Talk and listen. Tell people about your intentions, your successes, your setbacks and listen while they tell you of theirs.
• Don’t stop. Your change is continuous. Your life continues to unfold.
  

Thank You

Today is my first Thanksgiving Day as a member of the blogging community. The company of each of you is something I cherish. Thank you.

"Your work is to discover your work and then with all your heart to give yourself to it" ~~Buddha

RSS: A Deeper Shift in Consciousness

Low self-esteem is one of the more prevalent of the social maladies. Next to money, low self-esteem has been targeted as the root of all evils. Therapists around the world are being paid big bucks and working long hours to change people’s ideas of themselves.

Among those of us who consider ourselves at least moderately well-adjusted, self-esteem issues can still be an unseen force and they can manifest in the oddest places.

In my case, it was such a little thing, so little it went unnoticed. I was using email subscription services to keep up with my favorite blogs.

One of those favorites is Chris Cree’s SuccessCREEations. His post last Saturday was Business Blogging 101 - RSS and Feeds . I thought the information was going to be something for future reference until it occurred to me how pertinent it is to my work today.

Halfway through the article, I still had the mindset that he was talking to the “other guys”. Gradually, though, Chris began to speak to me. I’m one of those other guys, too.

See, even though the “less than” thought wasn’t there consciously, on some level there lurked the idea that "they" had made it and "I" was still waiting in the wings. Evidently, the “less than” thought was in there somewhere.

Over the past several days, the switch from email subscriptions to RSS has been made and it was time well spent.

On the practical side, the many of my favorite blogs are now in one handy place. From one screen, I can check on comments, re-read a post, see new articles as they’re published.

On the spiritual side (which is practical, if you ask me, but we won’t go into that now), the shift to greater self-worth has been deepened.

Isn’t it amazing what technology can do?

Meaningful Coincidence

A lot of good things have been happening in my life lately and, when I examined them, I found threads weaving everything together. Then it hit me. I’m being blessed with synchronicity.

Synchronicity, meaningful coincidences. Carl Jung, the Swiss psychologist, coined the word to describe the "temporally coincident occurrences of casual events." It’s two or more things happening coincidentally, but not at random. It’s these things manifesting in such a way as to suggest an underlying pattern; perhaps a spiritual dimension.

That there might be a spiritual dimension seems to be a sign that there’s a constant weave throughout the Universe, something more than cause and effect, with the implication that mind and matter are somehow interconnected. In other words, each of us is connected to Divine Energy and becoming aware of synchronicity is part of our continued spiritual awakening.

Deepak Chopra, MD, in his book “How to Know God: The Soul’s Journey into the Mystery of Mysteries” said:

“In spiritual reality, literally everything happens because it is mean to. The world is a meaningful place; everyone is working out their own lives’ purpose. At synchronous moments, you get a peek at just how connected your life is, how completely woven into the infinite tapestry of existence.”

Incidentally, this morning I took a book from one of my shelves, without considering where it would take me. It opened to an entry about synchronicity.

Your Noisy Mind Will Quiet

Sometimes my mind wanders so far and my thoughts race so quickly that it feels like I have one book in the left hand, one in the right and I’m trying to read both at the same time. Often, during those frenetic states, when my mind most needs stilling, something else distracts me. It must be time to meditate.

Once the meditation habit is broken, though, it’s not always easy to dive back into the water; better start with a wading pool.

This morning, I tried the deep waters first. Sitting comfortably and relaxed, eyes closed, breathing deeply, I decided to take out the trash. What?

Back in from the dumpster, it seemed like a good idea to set the mood by reading about meditation. Rick Cockrum at Shards of Consciousness, is a good one for spiritual soothing. It was an “ask and ye shall receive” moment. Parts One and Two of Concentrative Meditation.

Halfway through Part One, my mind wandered to the dishes in the sink, so the article had to wait while I did them. Funny thing is, in Part Two, Rick mentioned that. while learning to meditate (and, apparently re-learning to meditate), we can become easily distracted. He even said, “Washing the dishes can become very important to you”. At least my lack of focus was in the normal range.

My point is that distractions also come during meditation, but they’ll eventually be mastered by a stiller mind getting in touch with deep happiness and calm.

"Concentrative meditation is an excellent tool to use in personal growth and development. Though it is designed for, and most useful in spiritual growth, it is a powerful tool in restructuring your world view both by instilling more positive beliefs and attitude than you currently hold, and by bringing to the surface the negative, limiting beliefs on which you currently base your life." ~~Rick Cockrum

What's Between Negative And Positive?

Where’s your mental energy? How did you get there? Were you always there? Do you tend to switch between negative and positive? How do you make the switch?

About six weeks ago Chris Cree brought up the possibility that negative thinking might have some power in SuccessCreeations. I’m still on the fence with that one.

My vote then was for what I called the “equalizer”, the spot between negative and positive where we realize things need to be and/or are going to change. The spot where we face and address the reality of our situations and decide what action to take.

After some thought, though, it can’t be a simple spot. That place needs to be a plateau. We need time and space to put the clutch in, shift gears and maybe even stop the car. Today, I tend to agree with Chris that we can’t use positive thoughts to forget or ignore unpleasant negative realities.

From Norman Vincent Peale’s “The Power Of Positive Thinking” to friends who say “just think happy thoughts”, we have the idea we can think ourselves out of trouble. Well, we can think and wish all we want, but we still wake up in Kansas unless we act.

"We shouldn’t live in such fear of the term “negative” that it keeps us from facing reality." ~~Chris Cree

Same Thoughts, Different Plan

The series on “The Four Absolutes” won’t be finished as originally planned. While the pamphlet was never endorsed by any group, it’s could offend, sound preachy or otherwise annoy. Frankly, I found it a little long-winded, too.

However, I believe these Absolutes: Honesty, Unselfishness, Love, Purity are the foundation of spiritual life for each of us. With that in mind, how does a brief summary sound to you?

The concept of honesty is slammed through the window with too many “yeah, buts”, The bottom line is whether what we say and how we act toward ourselves is true or false. “ . . . and thou canst be false to no man . . . “

Is the unselfish person someone who gives to everyone else but denies the home front? That question deserves a resounding DUH. The concept of taking care of number one, is sound. There’s an old saying about “the shoemaker’s children running around in bare feet”.

Simply put, love is beauty and when we give it, we receive it. It’s what happens when we think before we speak, stop before we flip someone off, become a little less egocentric. It’s not “not having to say you’re sorry”.

Purity can best regarded as having sincerity, being free from hypocrisy. Easy to say; not always so easy to achieve. From Goethe: “in living as in knowing be intent upon the purist way”.

The First Absolute: Honesty

From the pamphlet, if you please. I'll paraphrase a living person who can refute; I'll only quote from something written about seventy years ago.

HONESTY

“Over and over we must ask ourselves, ‘Is it true or is it false?’ For honesty is the eternal search for truth. It is by far the most difficult of the four Absolutes, for anyone, but especially for us in this fellowship. The problem drinker develops genuine artistry in deceit. Too many (and we plead guilty) simply turn over a new leaf and relax. That is wrong. The real virtue in honesty lies in the persistent dedicated striving for it. There is no relaxed twilight zone, it’s either full speed ahead constantly or its not honesty we seek. And the unrelenting pursuit of truth will set you free, even if you don’t quite catch up to it. We need not choose or pursue falsity. All we need is to relax our pursuit of truth, and falsity will find us.

“The search for truth is the noblest expression of the soul. Let a human throw the engines of his soul into the doing or making of something good, and the instinct of workmanship alone will take care of his honesty. The noblest pleasure we can have is to find a great new truth and discard an old prejudice. When not actively sought, truth seldom comes to light, but falsehood does. Truth is life and falsity is spiritual death. It’s an everlasting, unrelenting instinct for truth that counts. Honesty is not a policy. It has to be a constant conscious state of mind.

“Accuracy is close to being a twin brother of honesty, but inaccuracy and exaggeration are at least ‘kissing cousins’ of dishonesty. We may bring ourselves to believe almost anything by rationalization, (another of our fine arts), and so it’s well to begin and end our inquiry with the question, ‘Is it true?’ Any man who loves to search for truth is precious to any fellowship or society. Any intended violation of honesty stabs the health of not only the doer but the whole fellowship. On the other hand if we are honest to the limit of our ability, the basic appetite for truth in others, which may be dormant but not dead, will rise majestically to join us. Like sobriety, it’s the power of example that does the job.

“It is much simpler to appear honest, than to be honest. We must strive to be in reality what we appear to be. It is easier to be honest with others than with ourselves. Our searching self-inventories help because the man who knows himself is at least on the doorstep of honesty. Our instinct for exhibitionism, even though held in check, is a foe of honesty. When we try to enhance our stature in the eyes of others, dishonesty is there in the shadows. When falsehood even creeps in, we are getting back on the merry-go-round because falsehoods not only disagree with truth, they quar4rel with each other. Remember?

“It is one thing to devoutly wish that the truth may be on your side, and it is quite another to which sincerely to be on the side of truth. Honesty would seem to be the toughest of our four absolutes and at the same time, the most exciting challenge. Our sobriety is a gift, but honesty is a grace that we must earn and constantly fight to protect and enlarge. ‘Is it true or false?’ Let us make that a ceaseless question that we try to answer with all the sober strength and intelligence we have.” ~~ Anon

Bear With Me, This Gets Better

Page Three of the Phamphlet.

The Absolutes

"We walked into this large group of which we had heard so much, but had never attended. From the vestibule we saw a placard on the corner of the far wall which said 'Easy Does it.' We turned left to park our coat. We turned back and there on the other corner of the same wall was a twin placard which said, 'First Things First.' Then facing to the front of the room, high above the platform we was in the largest letters of all, 'But for the Grace of God.' Then as our eyes descended, there directly on the front of the podium was another with four words, 'Honesty, Unselfishness, Purity and Love.'

"In the next ten minutes as we sat unnoticed in the last row waiting for the meeting to start, many thoughts tumbled through a mind that was really startled by this first face to face meeting with the four Absolutes for a very long time.

"We started to grade ourselves fearlessly on our own progress toward these Absolutes through long years of sobriety. The score was a pitiful, lonely little score. We thought of a fine lead recently heard in which a patient humble brother had told his story and had mentioned his overwhelming sense of gratitude as an important ingredient of his fifteen years of sobriety.

"And in listing things for which he was so grateful, he mentioned how comfortable it was to be completely honest. Certainly he meant nothing prideful. He simply meant that he told his wife and friends the truth as best he could, had no fishy stories to reconcile, was honest with money and material things, etc.

"This was a truly grateful, humble fellow. Certainly he did not resemble the man pictured in the cartoon, speaking to a large audience, pounding on the table and with a jutting chin proclaiming in a loud voice that he had more humility than anyone there and could prove it

"But just think of 'complete honesty.' Is it not the eternal search for truth which is endless, and in wich none achieve perfection?

"What do the four Absolutes mean to most of us? Words are tools. Like any other tools, they get rusty and corroded when not used. More importantly, we must familiarize ourselves with the tools, understand them, and ever improve our skill in their use. Else the end product, if any, is pathetically poor.

"We thought of a dear friend in the fellowship, prone like other alcoholics to move quickly from one hobby or interest to another, without really doing much with any of them. (Does that sound like someone you know?) Once this friend decided that working with his hands would solve some problems, quiet his nerves, perhaps help him to achieve serenity and balance. So he reviewed an impressive collection of tool catalogues with friends already addicted to the woodworking hoby.

"He bought a large expensive collection of tools, and a lot of equipment. He hired a carpenter to build a shop in his basement, install the equipment, and make custom-built racks to house the tools. But in the end not one shaving and not one tiny bit of saw-dust graced the floor. The idle tools serve just as well to keep our friend occupied while he doesn't go to meetings, do Twelfth Step work or engage in other happy activity in AA.

"How many of you will be completely honest and admit that you have put the four Absolutes in the attic, a little rusty from non-use perhaps, but none the worse for wear? Give or take a little, how many of us who still maintain the workshop for the Absolutes, will admit that not too many shavings or much sawdust from our activity have ever graced its floor? Or even assuming that the activity has persisted, how many will admit that the end product did not win a prize for its quality?

"Such lack of quality can only mean lack of objectives or lack of all-out efford toward such objectives. We must recognize the Absolutes as guideposts to the finest and highest objectives to mortal man. But recognition is not enough. We must use the tools."

A Beginning To The Absolutes

The Absolutes, as I've stated, are: Honesty, Unselfishness, Love, Purity. It would be irresponsible of me to give you my version. Please forgive the lenghty, but pertinent, words someone long ago had to say.

The Four Absolutes

Forward

"Spelled out as such, the Four Absolutes are not a formal part of our AA philosophy of lfe. Since this is true, some may claim the Absolutes shoudl be ignored. This premise is approximately as sound as it would be to suggest that the Holy Bible should be scuttled.

"The Absolutes were borrowed from the Oxford Goup Movement back in the days when our society was in its humble beginning. In those days our founders and their early colleagues were earnestly seeking for any and all sources of help to define and formulate suggestions that might guide us in the pursuit of a useful, happy and signifigant sober life.

"Because the Absolutes are not specifically repeated in our Steps or Traditions, some of us are inclined to forget them. Yet in many old time groups where the solid spirit of our fellowship is so strongly exemplified, the Absolutes receive frequent mention. Indeed, you often find a set of old placards, carfelly preserved, which are trotted out for prominent display each meeting night.

"There could be unanimity on the proposition that living our way life must include not only an awareness but a constant striving toward greater achievement in the qualities which the Absolutes represent. Many who have lost the precious gift of sobriety would ascribe it to carelessness in seeking these objectives. If you will revisit the Twelve Steps with care, you will find the Four Absolutes form a thread which is discermible [sic] in a sober life of quality, every step of a glorious journey"

Honesty, Unselfishness, Love, Purity

For those of you who knew this blog at Orble, I'm not leaving from animosity. Hannah (my computer) doesn't care for their cyber handshakes or they don't care for hers. Regardless, I felt the need to bring 'Living Spiritually' here.

The first few posts here will bring you and me up to date with each other.

A few months back, I was given a phamphlet: "The Four Absolutes". It has no known author, so far as I know. This pamphlet speaks of Honesty, Unselfishness, Love, Purity.

It was written some where in the 30's or 40's. Would that mean that any of us should give it little credence? I believe none of you will.

'Living Spiritually' is an important part of me. Will you join me? Accept what you want? Toss what doesn't speak to you?

You, whoever you are, are in my spiritual journey as I am in yours.